The Love Artist Aesthetic pt 1

The Love Artist aesthetic is kind of cliché but it works.  i throw a lot of roses around & light a lot of candles.  there is a lot of pink & red & a touch of green.  i like a buttoned up Victorian look & a corset goes well under everything but really i like to be as naked as possible 

at the Chelsea the roses were a kind of blushy mauve with a darker pink at the edges

there is a long tradition of being provocative in performance art & i can certainly be a brat in that regard but i do want you to believe me when I say i love them. i think about my audience a lot & their comfort level.  i want to touch them but i don't like to startle them unnecessarily

i bought the goth candle holders at Walmart.  it's practically blasphemy to do my love shopping there but i live in the sticks & it was the night before & i was looking for some roses to appliqué onto my chemise as a last minute costume idea & here in the sticks there aren't so many choices left after the current corporate world domination, particularly after 6 pm

i told everyone ahead of time that i would be naked & that wasn't exactly true.  the chemise was sheer & a vehicle for the embroidered roses that would be plastered to my body once I got wet

if you doubt how naked i was, there are a few men still wandering around who will testify.  some women too, but with the men, i could feel what I can euphemistically call the energy when they noticed how naked i was. i accepted it as love & i believe it was

i know i said i worry about everyone being comfortable but really, they all just plopped right down.  When I asked everyone if i could place my hands on their heads, no one said no.  When i asked them to close their eyes, they all did, they all trusted me like babies

it was when i rose up on my knees to place my hands on their heads, that they could see my breasts & all the tattoos & roses, close to their face, just before they closed their eyes

Matt, & then Ian, sat the back of the toilet & depending on how many people were in the room, they had to lift their guitars high in the air to play or they were accidentally flushing it.  having them there made me both brave & more myself

there was one moment each day where they sang & both times their voices were different than I imagined, a little fragile & slow, like they might crack

i loved how we communicated, like how i've seen bob dylan do, with a nod of my head and a single semi-sullen authoritative word

they were so devoted & i am so grateful

the candle holders had big Victorian crosses on them.  the guy at the checkout at Walmart asked me if i was planning a religious event.  i told him i was a performance artist & they were more atmospheric than anything else.  he said, "cool" & when i asked him if we were done he said "unfortunately"

the candles were red, burgundy & a kind of cinnamon-y brown.  they all smelt of spice.  some said pomegranates on their box. i had a dream on the second night that  the candles became pomegranates & the pomegranates became money

i totally forgot about the crosses when i turned out the lights

Comments

[valdez the sinner]

SORRY I MISSED THAT -SOUNDS LIKE SOMTHIN I COULD HAVE SOAKED UP -BUT READING ABOUT IT WORKED--KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK MISS K